It’s 2020 and you want to see someone important in your life, someone whom you do not live with. Maybe it’s your friend. Or your child. Your grandchild. Your sibling. If they live far away, there is really only one option - you can see them on a computer. Okay, so, you do have some choices - do you want to Zoom? Or use Skype? Or FaceTime? Google hangouts? Whichever platform you choose, you’re going to end up looking at your loved one through a box on a screen.
Let’s say that person lives nearby and it’s during the months when we were not under a complete stay-at-home order. You decide you want to see them. How do you do it? Hopefully, if following safety protocols, you’ll see them outside, distanced, and masked.
MASKED? Let’s stop for a minute to think about that word and what it means. Pre-covid, we used the word “masked” to refer to someone who wants to hide their identity. To obscure who they are. They literally or metaphorically ‘mask’ themselves.
And now, we all have masks. We are all literally wearing masks. Let's see them! Go get your mask and put it on for a minute.
(wait while people get their masks, put them on)
Take a minute and look through all the zoom boxes. Try to see which faces you recognize and which ones you don’t. It’s not really fair since we have our names visible on zoom, but if we got rid of all the names, which faces would you recognize? And which ones would you not know, because they are masked?
Leave them on for a moment. In this week’s Torah portion, Vayigash, Joseph reveals himself to his brothers. It’s a dramatic scene (read Gen 45:1-15).
Joseph was not wearing a literal mask, but he was “masked,” metaphorically. He had assumed an Egyptian identity - Egyptian clothes, hairstyle, even language - so they did not recognize him. Until he unmasked himself. He sent the translator out of the room, presumably switching back into his native language of Hebrew. He tells his brothers who he really is. He takes off his “mask.” And everyone weeps.
This is the last Shabbat of 2020, the year of being masked. So what will happen when, someday, we unmask? What will be revealed?
Take one last look at everyone in masks. Now, everyone, take off your masks.
I’ve heard of someone who prefers to use the word “face covering” to “mask”, because when we cover our faces for safety during this Covid-era, our intention is not to “mask” our identity. Our intention is just to cover our face to stay safe. But in covering our faces - with face coverings - we do inadvertently “mask ourselves” sometimes. It is harder to tell who someone is when they’re wearing a mask. It is harder to read emotion when we can’t see the lower half of someone’s face. Yes, we can see the “smize” - the smile with one’s eyes - but still - it’s much harder to have a sense of another person’s feelings while they are covering their face.
The challenges of what’s hidden and what’s revealed are not only related to wearing face coverings, but it’s also an issue on zoom. We know which parts of our space will be seen on screen, so we make decisions about what will show and what won’t. We’ve all probably seen pictures like this
It’s not only a mess on the floor that we might be trying to hide. We try to project a certain vision of ourselves, curated just so. It’s not only on zoom. It’s on Facebook, on phone calls, and more. We decide what we want to reveal about ourselves.
But what about the mess? What about the messy side of life, that we ALL have? Where do reveal that? To whom? When do we let down our guard to show one another who we really are? Even all the unpleasant parts?
This year with Covid has been exhausting, isolating, and challenging on many levels. But one of the challenges has been figuring out how to relate to one another through face coverings, through zoom, through phone calls, and without regular in-person interactions. What is lost when all we have is a partial face? Or a full face but contained in a box on screen?
Let us learn from Joseph that there is power in revealing ourselves, even when it makes us weep.
This week, on this last Shabbat of 2020, let us commit to revealing more of ourselves in 2021. Let us share our aches. Share our pains. Share our feelings. Let us open up emotionally, even if we have to do it while in a zoom box or while wearing face coverings. Even if ‘hiding’ things on our screen is so easy. May we reach out to one another in full humanity. Let the tears flow, as someday, we WILL come back together… God-willing, sometime in 2021, fully vaccinated, and in full health.
And let us say, AMEN!
*this drash was delivered for Temple Isaiah on 12/25/20
